Like most parents, I have it all figured out.

HAHAHAHAHAHA.

For real though, being a working parent is hard and I looooove me some systems and best practices.

When home life feels calm(ish), I can bring my best self to work — maximizing time, energy, and focus on founders.

It’s true for all working parents — but especially so when you’re a founder and your family isn’t the only source of chaos in your life. (Ahem, startups, ahem.)

Routines are key and my husband and I have tested and iterated over the years with our two kids, now 5 and 7 years old.

It’s different for everyone (and different life stages) but here’s what works for us that might spark an idea for you!

Spoiler alert — these are helpful for anyone, even if you don’t have kids. Adults like routines too.😉

Here are 5 things we do every week as working parents to save our sanity and keep a connected, happy family life.

1. Meal Prep

(Estimated Time: 1 hr/week)

The most stressful time of day for a parent?

30 minutes before dinner is ready when everyone is whining and hangry, including you!

We used to prep staples every week.

This works great…unless it’s 6:30p, you just got home from soccer practice, and DINNER IS NOT READY AT THAT EXACT MOMENT.

(But, boy, do you have a lot of great cut up veggies in the fridge! 🙃)

Our new strategy?

Make a bulk meal on Sunday that will get us through at least 2 dinners that week.

We have an arsenal of quick meals for 2 other days, 1 night of leftovers, and then we’ve made it to the weekend! 😅

Here’s a few meal ideas (+ easy lunches for work) but happy to share more if folks are interested - just reply or comment.

2. Sunday Sit Down

(Estimated Time: 15 min/week)

On Sunday afternoon or evening, we always review the upcoming week as a family.

Boring, simple, and absolutely essential to our sanity and well-being.

We pull out our phones, look at work and personal GCals, and go through day by day.

• Who is doing daycare/school pick up and drop off?

• Who has what events or practices on what days?

• Any special events for school, work, or otherwise?

• What meals on what days?

• Workout plans?

• Other errands or appointments?

We usually find a few spots where we need to:

• coordinate further (aka last minute call to grandparents for help 😂)

• have a to-do we forgot about (buy snacks for the soccer game!!)

• clarify who is doing what (glad we didn’t leave a child at daycare all night)

The kids participate so they know what’s happening and will chime in with things like, “My library book is due that day” or “I have Show and Share on Friday.”

3. Rose, Bud, Thorn

(Estimated Time: 10 min/day)

Every night at bedtime, we gather in the kids’ room and share:

• Rose - something good from the day

• Bud - something you’re looking forward to

• Thorn - any upsets or frustrations

Daily stand up meets gratitude journal.

We like it as a:

• Connection point

• Debrief and reflection on the day

• Source of info about how our kids (and partner!) are doing

• Way to reinforce our values (e.g. my Rose was running with friends, my Rose was how well everyone did on the car trip)

Lest you think we are Leave It To Beaver, it also involves arguing about who goes first and annoyance over interruptions.

My thorn today is…yelling at my kids during rose, bud, thorn. 😉

4. Job Cards

(Estimated Time: 30 min to setup, then 1 min/day)

What’s more annoying: picking up after your kids or reminding them to pick up after themselves?

TRICK QUESTION.

They are both f-ing annoying!!!

Enter the handy index card, our one-two punch solution for kids chores and the daily reminders of “yes, even today, you have to brush your teeth, and also every day for the rest of your life.”

How It Works:

1. Write and/or draw pictures of each task on an index card.

2. Parent lays out the appropriate cards depending on time of day, activities.

3. Child has visual “checklist” of tasks that need to get done.

We put ours on the kitchen table and the kids put a token on the card when it’s completed.

Does it need to be cards? Nope. Any kind of visual, analog schedule or chart can work.

Like any new system, it can take a bit of time to implement and get user adoption, but as a startup founder, you’re familiar with that! 😉

5. Books

(Estimated Time: no extra time, swap out other activities)

I’d like to share a retro invention that will blow your mind:

BOOKS!

Books are really awesome and kids love them. Books calm my kids down, while screen time ends in shouting or crying.

Favorite Book Moments:

• Audio books on car trips

  • Free from the library

  • Everyone can listen together

• “Books in bed”

  • Too tired or busy to read to your kids? Let them read to themselves in bed.

  • We stumbled into this “treat” that our kids love. Lazy parenting FTW!

• Read at dinner

  • Tired of fart jokes at dinner? No time for bedtime reading? Read aloud to your kids at dinnertime!

  • We do a chapter book that everyone (read: me) enjoys, 1 chapter per night.

  • We are missing out on building conversation skills but sometimes everyone (read: me) needs a break from non-stop bickering talking.

Parenting Advice From Actual Experts

If you’re worried that I have no qualifications to give parenting advice (valid) and want to know what experts recommend, here are two resources that I love!

• The 3 Big Questions For A Frantic Family by Patrick Lencioni (business parable guru - s/o Ellen Twomey for sharing with me!)

• The Science of Well Being for Parents from Laurie Santos (Professor of Psychology at Yale)

What are mission-critical habits for you as a working parent? Any routines or strategies that work for you? What parallels do you see between families and startups?